I started drinking when I was 14. I worked in a restaurant and with the money I got from tips I would ask friends to get me beer. I don’t know why. It’s just that the beer would call me: “You need beer. You need beer.”
My son was born in 1983, when I was 33 years old. I was a single mom. Gradually I started drinking more and more.
Drinking to escape depression
When my son was 13, I went through a really bad depression, and I thought what would heal me was to drink and smoke and not care about anything else. Before I started to work, I’d smoke two cigarettes and drink three beers so I’d feel OK.
Then I’d work.
After work I would buy another six- pack, sometimes wine and whiskey. To me it was a good feeling. But I wouldn’t take care of my son, and I was hurting my body.
I worked at a country club. When I’d get a break, I’d go to the bathroom and steal a beer to drink. The manager finally realized it and said, “You better stop or we’ll have to fire you.” The club warned me three times, and then they fired me.
I had money saved up.
I started going every two days to the bank to get money and buy beer. I wasn’t eating, just drinking. I passed out and my mom called an ambulance. I was in a coma and dreaming three days.
In my dreams I prayed, “My Lord, I beg of you, help me.”
Then my Lord said, “Daughter, everyone loves you and needs you, especially your mom and your son. I want you to make up your mind whether it’s heaven or hell.”
I stopped drinking, but things got worse
I was having seizures because my heart was so weak from all the alcohol and smoking. Then my dad and mom died, I got congestive heart failure, and I had another big depression.
My neighbor, Tola, would visit me and insist for me to go to her church, but I wouldn’t go. Sometimes she’d see my house really dirty, and she would clean it.
In 2008 I saw two beautiful little girls, 12 or 13 years old, at the park. “Miss!” they greeted me. And they invited me to go to their church.
It was Tola’s church
So, I started going. I prayed, “My Jesus, I want to change.” After that when I went to church, it was like getting a gift from the Lord, like when I used to get dolls and toys at Christmas.
One day a year later I started choking, and my whole body was shaking terribly. I started seeing things blurry and black.
So I called the ambulance.
It was their sixth time to come for me. When they came, they said “We’ve never seen you this bad.”
At 8 p.m. in the hospital, I closed my eyes and didn’t wake up until 10 p.m. the next night.
I had a cardiac arrest
For two days I would see my good Lord standing with his hands open, looking at me saying, “¡Hija, que todas te quieren!”
When he told me “Daughter, everybody loves you,” my body felt light. It was the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me. The doctor said I woke with tears in my eyes and a smile on my face.
I felt like I was flying.
The nurse said, “Ay Señora, it must have been beautiful where you were!”
I had my EKG and they said “You’re doing great!” Then they sent me home.
Depression and Alchoholism: I think I’ll never forget it
I died at the hospital. I was blacking out in my house, but when I got to the hospital, that’s when I collapsed and went up there. He took out all the bad inside me, all my loneliness.
Since I saw Jesus at the hospital, I don’t worry anymore. I live one day at a time.
The Bible says
“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13). And Jesus taught “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3).
Today’s Prayer
I cry out to you, Jesus, to help me in my trouble. Change my attitude until I seek you with all my heart. Amen.
Becky Cerling Powers is the author of Sticky Fingers, Sticky Minds: Quick Reads for Helping Kids Thrive, a Bathroom Book for people who want to be better parents but live such busy lives that they hardly have time to figure out how.
What did Jesus mean when he said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit”? What does it look like for somebody to be “poor in spirit”?
The story of King Ahaziah in the Old Testament gives us hints.
The Story of King Ahaziah and Elijah
Ahaziah was one of the kings of ancient Israel during the time of God’s prophet Elijah.
One day, he fell through the second-story railing of his house to the ground below. He was severely injured.
So he sent messengers to Baal-zebub, the god of the people of Ekron, to ask if he would recover from his injuries.
Elijah met the messengers on their way.
“Give the king this message,” he told them.
‘“Why are you going to the god of Ekron? Is there no God in Israel? Here is what the Lord God says to the king: “You will not be able to get up from your bed. You are going to die.”’”
King Ahaziah’s Attempt to Control the Prophet
The messengers went back to the king and told him what happened.
“What did the man who stopped you look like?” Ahaziah asked.
“He wore a hairy garment with a leather belt around his waist,” they said.
“I know who that is!” the king said. “That’s Elijah!” And he ordered one of his military captains to take 50 men, arrest Elijah, and bring him to the king.
The captain and his 50 men located Elijah sitting on top of a hill.
“Man of God!” the captain yelled. “Come down here right now! I have orders to bring you to the king!”
“If I really am a Man of God,” Elijah said, “may fire come down from heaven and consume you all!”
Just then, a ball of fire dropped from the sky. It landed on the men, and they all burned up.
So, the king sent another captain with 50 men to arrest Elijah. They, too, found him on top of the hill. “Man of God! The king says, ‘Come down at once!’” the captain yelled.
“If I am a Man of God,” Elijah said, “may fire come down from heaven and consume you all!”
Once again a fireball fell from the sky & killed all the men.
But this captain was different. He climbed up the hill and fell on his knees at Elijah’s feet.
“Have compassion on me and these 50 men!” he begged. “We know what happened to all the others. Fire from heaven fell on those two captains and their 50 men. Now, please, spare our lives!”
The angel of the Lord told Elijah, “Go down with him to the king. Do not be afraid.”
So, Elijah went to the king with the captain and his 50 men.
He gave God’s message to the king: “The Lord God says to you ‘Do you think there is no God in Israel for you to consult? Is that why you sent messengers to consult with Baal-zebub the god of Ekron? Because you did this, you will never be able to get up from your bed. You will surely die!’”
So King Ahaziah died as God said. He was king of Israel for only two years.
What Does It Mean to Be Poor in Spirit?
Being poor in spirit means realizing you are poor—you do not have what you need.
It also means realizing you are powerless. You not only don’t have what you need, but you also have no power to get it.
To be poor in spirit toward God means that you come to him for what you need, realizing that you can’t bribe him to help you, that you can’t manipulate or trick him into helping you, and that you can’t force him to help you. All you can do is ask nicely.
A prayer for us all
Lord I am poor & You are rich. I can’t bribe You or pay You to help me.
All the power on earth is Yours. I cannot solve my problems today or force You to help me.
You are too wise for me to trick You into helping and certainly too wise for me to advise You on how to help. Have compassion on me, Lord. Please help me in my need. Amen.
All Things Bright and Beautiful by the Irish poet Cecil Frances Alexander is a Christian hymn that explains part of the Apostle’s Creed in poetry for children.Maybe Cecil Frances hid her poetry under the carpet because she thought her father would disapprove.
She was a timid nine-year old girl in Ireland in 1827, and her father Major John Humphreys of the Royal Marines was a stern man.
But her father saw the bulge in the rug in the back room of their house.
When he investigated, he found his daughter’s poems, and something about them must have touched him. Perhaps, he thought, his little girl had talent.
So he sent the poems to his friend John Keble, who was a clergyman and a poet. Keble wrote back.
Young Fanny, as the family called her, was a gifted writer, he said. She should be encouraged.
So Fanny’s father enlisted the family in encouraging the little girl. The next Saturday he called the family together and read Fanny’s poems out loud. Then he showed the family a box with a slot in the top.
Whenever Fanny finished writing a poem, he explained, she should put the poem into the slot. Then when the family came together the next Saturday, she would read the poem.
The family encouraged her with helpful remarks.
When Fanny grew up, she married and became well known as a writer of hymns.
One day Fanny was sitting next to a sick child trying to explain The Apostle’s Creed, which begins “I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth...”
The child couldn’t understand the way the creed was phrased.
So Fanny wrote children’s poems to put the meaning of the Creed into simple words children can understand. Here is one of the poems she wrote:
I started drinking when I was 14. I worked in a restaurant and with the money I got from tips I would ask friends to get me beer. I don’t know why. It’s just that the beer would call me: “You need beer. You need beer.”
My son was born in 1983, when I was 33 years old. I was a single mom. Gradually I started drinking more and more.
Drinking to escape depression
When my son was 13, I went through a really bad depression, and I thought what would heal me was to drink and smoke and not care about anything else. Before I started to work, I’d smoke two cigarettes and drink three beers so I’d feel OK.
Then I’d work.
After work I would buy another six- pack, sometimes wine and whiskey. To me it was a good feeling. But I wouldn’t take care of my son, and I was hurting my body.
I worked at a country club. When I’d get a break, I’d go to the bathroom and steal a beer to drink. The manager finally realized it and said, “You better stop or we’ll have to fire you.” The club warned me three times, and then they fired me.
I had money saved up.
I started going every two days to the bank to get money and buy beer. I wasn’t eating, just drinking. I passed out and my mom called an ambulance. I was in a coma and dreaming three days.
In my dreams I prayed, “My Lord, I beg of you, help me.”
Then my Lord said, “Daughter, everyone loves you and needs you, especially your mom and your son. I want you to make up your mind whether it’s heaven or hell.”
I stopped drinking, but things got worse
I was having seizures because my heart was so weak from all the alcohol and smoking. Then my dad and mom died, I got congestive heart failure, and I had another big depression.
My neighbor, Tola, would visit me and insist for me to go to her church, but I wouldn’t go. Sometimes she’d see my house really dirty, and she would clean it.
In 2008 I saw two beautiful little girls, 12 or 13 years old, at the park. “Miss!” they greeted me. And they invited me to go to their church.
It was Tola’s church
So, I started going. I prayed, “My Jesus, I want to change.” After that when I went to church, it was like getting a gift from the Lord, like when I used to get dolls and toys at Christmas.
One day a year later I started choking, and my whole body was shaking terribly. I started seeing things blurry and black.
So I called the ambulance.
It was their sixth time to come for me. When they came, they said “We’ve never seen you this bad.”
At 8 p.m. in the hospital, I closed my eyes and didn’t wake up until 10 p.m. the next night.
I had a cardiac arrest
For two days I would see my good Lord standing with his hands open, looking at me saying, “¡Hija, que todas te quieren!”
When he told me “Daughter, everybody loves you,” my body felt light. It was the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me. The doctor said I woke with tears in my eyes and a smile on my face.
I felt like I was flying.
The nurse said, “Ay Señora, it must have been beautiful where you were!”
I had my EKG and they said “You’re doing great!” Then they sent me home.
Depression and Alchoholism: I think I’ll never forget it
I died at the hospital. I was blacking out in my house, but when I got to the hospital, that’s when I collapsed and went up there. He took out all the bad inside me, all my loneliness.
Since I saw Jesus at the hospital, I don’t worry anymore. I live one day at a time.
The Bible says
“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13). And Jesus taught “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3).
Today’s Prayer
I cry out to you, Jesus, to help me in my trouble. Change my attitude until I seek you with all my heart. Amen.
© 2019 Becky Cerling Powers, updated 2025
Becky Cerling Powers is the author of Sticky Fingers, Sticky Minds: Quick Reads for Helping Kids Thrive, a Bathroom Book for people who want to be better parents but live such busy lives that they hardly have time to figure out how.