I hadn’t seen my friend Joann in the five years since we moved to another state, when suddenly she phoned and then showed up for a visit. Joann said that a year or so after we moved, her younger son Scot had become a teen and started to rebel. She suspected he was using drugs.
Then she began noticing expensive new possessions in his room. Late one night, she realized he was nowhere in the house, but his bedroom window was wide open.
He had snuck out.
What was going on? She was horrified, angry, worried, scared.
But, she said, while she was praying for her son one day, the Lord directed her attention to Ephesians 6: 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Scot was made of flesh and blood.
So, she replaced the words “flesh and blood” with his name and made the verse personal: For my struggle is not against Scot, but against the rulers…authorities…powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Well, it sure felt like her struggle was with Scot. But St. Paul said no. Her real struggle was with dark powers that were trying to destroy her son. And her. And her family, if possible. As well as her husband’s ministry…
Joann had been my assistant pastor’s wife, we’d worked closely together to develop a children’s ministry at our church, and we’d had a strong prayer relationship before her husband lost his position in a church conflict. Now her husband was still out of work and their son’s behavior and reputation were hindering his ability to seek a local pastorate. (Of course, as a former pastor’s wife, she was coming under as much criticism for their son’s rebellion as Scot’s father was.)
Joann’s insight from Ephesians changed her attitude, she told me.
Fury and fear gave way to compassion. Scot’s behavior still upset her, but now she saw it in a new light that gave her the perspective to keep on showing Scot loving acceptance and to keep on trying to communicate.
One night Joann said she woke up feeling like Scot was in great danger, and she needed to pray for him. She checked his bedroom. It was empty. She prayed through the early morning hours until he returned home.
The next day the police came to their door.
She and her husband learned that those nights when Scot climbed out his window were nights when he was meeting up with his buddies for drug parties or for breaking into people’s houses, stealing their possessions and selling them to get money for more drug parties. The previous night Scot and his drug buddies had partied, got very high, stole a car, wrecked it, and decided that the best way to cover their crime was to set the car on fire. Then, in a hazy stupor, they all sat down to watch it burn and explode. They could have been killed.
Scot landed in court and barely missed being sent to a detention center. Instead, the judge ordered probation and a big fine. Scott had to get a job to pay off his fine and he had to meet regularly with a probation officer.
I wish I could say that Scot was a model son from then on, but he wasn’t.
When Joann visited me, he was doing better. But it still took many more years before he finally became a Christian, and of course becoming a believer didn’t end the complications and repercussions he and his parents suffered from his years of irresponsibility. However, Joann’s insights on the Ephesians passage and other scriptures kept her strong through the years, able to continue combatting her real enemy, which was not her son but the destroyer of souls. (And meantime, her husband did get a job. He spent the rest of his working life as a chaplain for prisoners and their families at the state prison.)
Joann’s visit came at just the right time for me.
I was going through a painful midlife crisis, dissatisfied with my marriage and feeling like I kept getting thwarted by the same dilemmas over and over. I began praying through Ephesians 6:12ff, gaining insight into the meaning and use of spiritual weapons. My life began to turn around. It took a while, but new insights began giving my husband and me new ways of thinking and relating. We healed, individually and as a married couple. Helpful strategies replaced destructive patterns; difficult family situations and relationships became manageable; and I finally became free to do the research and writing my soul required. I learned so much in that healing process that I often thought I could write a book about it. Maybe I am starting to do that now.
Here is one of many things I learned:
Whenever I was in a conflict, or suspected one brewing, I needed to start my days praying through Ephesians 6:10-20:
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank You for giving me a full set of armor for today’s spiritual battles so I can take my stand against the devil’s schemes.
I acknowledge that my struggle today is not really against __________. It’s against powers of darkness and spiritual forces of evil that are trying to destroy him/her/them/us. Help me, I pray, to put on the full armor You’ve given me and stand my ground, and just keep standing.
I want to put on the belt of truth. I want to give up wishful thinking and give up my personal version of reality. I ask you to show me the truth here and help me see what’s really going on.
Please help me to take off my own self-righteousness, my “rightness” (“He must admit that I am right and he is wrong”) and be satisfied to be covered instead with the righteousness of Jesus Christ. I do, however, want as much as possible to do whatever is right. So…what is my responsibility here? Help me to recognize it and do it.
I also want to walk in the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. I forgive* ________ for ________ Please help me to walk today with a readiness to forgive and reconcile.
You are my shield, O Lord. I trust in You. Your sacrifice covers me so completely that whatever accusations come against me, I am not condemned. If You, God Almighty, if You are for me, it doesn’t matter who is against me. It doesn’t matter who tries to condemn or shame me. Nothing can separate me from Your love.
I want to put on the helmet of salvation as well, to worship You and let You renew my mind so I can think with the mind of Christ.
Now I ask, “What is Your Word for this situation? Show me and help me to wield it properly as a sword in the conflict.”
And finally, thank You that Jesus is praying for me and for everyone involved in any battle. Please help me to depend on You all day long, looking to You and asking You for what I need like a hungry child running to her parent to ask for something to eat.
I ask this in the name of Jesus,
Amen
*forgiving can take more time than this; I might have to pray and say that I am not yet able, but I am willing to become able to forgive; forgiveness for deep hurts requires a grieving process and that can take time
© Becky Cerling Powers 2021
Reprint with attribution only
Becky Cerling Powers is the author of Laura’s Children: the hidden story of a Chinese orphanage and Sticky Fingers, Sticky Minds: quick reads for helping kids thrive. She blogs at www.beckypowers.com “Family Conflict, Family Struggles” is the first story in a collection of stories explaining and describing the use of the spiritual weapons that the apostle Paul listed in Ephesians 6:10-20. To find the other stories, enter “reflections on spiritual warfare” in the Search Bar
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Insights & Reflections for Parents in October: from the Parent Powerline
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Figuring Out a Child's Learning Style: insights from the Parent Powerline
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8/20/2022
Like the Wind: reflections on spiritual warfare
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Enlighten the Eyes of my Heart: reflections on spiritual warfare
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The Interrogation of Divine Promise: reflections on spiritual warfare
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Insights and Reflections for Parents in July: from the Parent Powerline
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When Healing Hurts: reflections on spiritual warfare in pain
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Insights and Reflections for Parents in June: from the Parent Powerline
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Truce for Sibling Wars: reflections on spiritual warfare
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5/19/2022
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Safe Amid Snakes and Semi-Trucks: reflections on spiritual warfare
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Dead Squirrel Forgiveness: reflections on spiritual warfare
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Forgiving Grandmother Eberhardt: reflections on spiritual warfare
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4/12/2022
Rosebud's Interrogation: reflections on spiritual warfare
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4/5/2022
New Bride Confusion: reflections on spiritual warfare
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4/4/2022
Toddlers Helping: insights from the Parent Powerline
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3/21/2022
Lament - Complaining as Worship: reflections on spiritual warfare in grief & anger
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3/16/2022
A Dream That Changed Me: reflections on spiritual warfare
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3/9/2022
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Preventing Parent Burnout: insights from the Parent Powerline
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2/7/2022
Playing Games with Kids: insights from the Parent Powerline
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2/6/2022
Insights and Reflections for Parents in February: from the Parent Powerline
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2/1/2022
Family Conflict, Family Struggles: reflections on spiritual warfare, beginning
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1/22/2022
Insights & Reflections for Parents in January: from the Parent Powerline
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1/1/2022
Neighborhood Yeast: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
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12/27/2021
Children of the Heavenly Father: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
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12/21/2021
Christmas Contentment: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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12/11/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in December: from the Parent Powerline
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12/1/2021
Pied Piper Dad: memorial and parenting reflections from the Parent Powerline
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11/22/2021
Golden Rule Respect: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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11/12/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in November: from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
11/4/2021
Enjoying Money Without Spending it: insights from the Parent Powerline
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10/14/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in October: from the Parent Powerline
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10/1/2021
Yes Means Yes, No Means No: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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9/26/2021
The Tire 'Em Out Principle for Long Trips and Schoolwork: insights from the Parent Powerline
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9/18/2021
Family Treasure Hunts: parenting insights from the parent powerline
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9/12/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in September: from the Parent Powerline
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9/1/2021
The Handy Dandy Adaptable Review Game, Cooperation Concentration: Parent Powerline insights
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8/2/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in August: from the Parent Powerline
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7/30/2021
Camping with Kids: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
7/28/2021
Hymn for a Baby: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
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7/22/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in July: from the Parent Powerline
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7/1/2021
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Why Smart Kids Can't All Read by Age 6: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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6/10/2021
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6/9/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in June: from the Parent Powerline
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The Balances of Parenting: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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5/18/2021
Letting Daughters Grow: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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5/8/2021
Insights & Reflections for Parents in May: from the Parent Powerline
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4/22/2021
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4/12/2021
Helping Kids with Math: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
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4/5/2021
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4/1/2021
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3/25/2021
Honey Tree: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
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3/23/2021
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3/21/2021
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3/15/2021
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3/12/2021
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3/10/2021
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3/5/2021
The Grumble Family: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Anonymous
3/3/2021
Being a Better Parent...One Week at a Time...in March
Becky Cerling Powers
2/28/2021
Henry O. Flipper: a black history month story from the Story Powerline
Randy Limbird
2/24/2021
Preparing to Raise Teens: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
2/18/2021
Neighbor Love: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
2/17/2021
No Matter What, I Love You Every Day: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers and Robert G Cerling
2/14/2021
Mental Maps: a faith based story on love from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
2/10/2021
Putting Myself in the Love Chapter: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Erik Powers
2/8/2021
Reading to Babies: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
2/5/2021
Being a Better Parent....One Week at a Time...in February 2021
Becky Cerling Powers
2/1/2021
Resolving the Past: a faith-based story from the Story Powerline
Sharon Withers as told to Becky Cerling Powers
1/22/2021
God Sets the Lonely in Families: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Sharon Withers as told to Becky Cerling Powers
1/21/2021
Keep Trying: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Laura Jane Cerling
1/13/2021
Hooray for Mother Goose! Parenting Insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
1/5/2021
Being a Better Parent....One Week at a Time...in January 2021
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1/2/2021
Working With -- Not Against -- Life Seasons: parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
12/28/2020
Why Play With the Kids? parenting insights from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
12/21/2020
Breaking Barriers with Kindness: a faith based Christmas story from the Story Powerline
Laura Jane Cerling
12/10/2020
Shoe Shine Boy: a faith based Christmas story from the Story Powerline
Ruben Fierro as told to Maria Luisa Navarro
12/4/2020
Slow Down for Christmas: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
12/1/2020
Ruth & Boaz, Part 2: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Maria Luisa Navarro
11/12/2020
Ruth & Boaz, Part 1: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Maria Luisa Navarro
11/9/2020
Enemies No More, Part 2: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
10/30/2020
Enemies No More, Part 1: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
10/28/2020
Double Minded Doggie: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
10/22/2020
The Father's Blessing: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
10/13/2020
Dad's Green Packard: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
10/10/2020
Hill of Woman's Fidelity: a faith based Beatitudes story from the Story Powerline
Retold by Becky Cerling Powers
10/1/2020
In Praise of Naps: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
9/28/2020
Music Enriches the Family: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
9/10/2020
Pre-School at Home During Covid-19: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
8/21/2020
Parenting in the Mess: Tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
8/16/2020
Grandpa Thure Cerling, Part 2: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
8/4/2020
Grandpa Thure Cerling, Part 1: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
8/4/2020
Temptation: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Glen A. Hinshaw
7/23/2020
TALK: A Simple Way to Help Kids with School: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
7/21/2020
Honest Abe Lincoln: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Randy Limbird
7/14/2020
The Most Conscientious Hunter I Ever Met: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Glen A. Hinshaw
6/24/2020
Washing Feet: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers and Lee Merrill Byrd
6/17/2020
No Parking: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
6/10/2020
Ruby Bridges, part 2: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
6/3/2020
Ruby Bridges, part 1: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
6/2/2020
Raising Fluent Readers: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
5/29/2020
Unwanted Baby: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Eileen as told to Becky Cerling Powers
5/26/2020
Family Funnies: Tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
5/22/2020
Joey's Letters: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Lee Merrill Byrd
5/21/2020
Alzheimer Valley: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
5/13/2020
Amaris Luz, Light from Darkness: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Lee Merrill Byrd
4/28/2020
Let Kids Cure Their Own Boredom: Tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
4/15/2020
Naaman, Rich in Money and Presumption: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs and Becky Cerling Powers
4/14/2020
David, Bathsheba & Psalm 51: a faith based story story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
4/9/2020
The Hundred Chart: math lesson tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
4/8/2020
The Beer Would Call Me: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Beatriz Balcort as told to Becky Cerling Powers
4/7/2020
Turned Around: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Brian Bolton with Becky Cerling Powers
4/2/2020
Elijah & the Captain of 50 Men: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Retold by Becky Cerling Powers
3/31/2020
Fear in Residence: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
3/24/2020
Household Management During COVID-19 Time: tips from the Parent Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
3/23/2020
Dreaming of Anita Jo: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
3/12/2020
No Complaint Dinners: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Laura Jane Cerling
3/10/2020
DIY Plumbing: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Jennifer Cummings
3/5/2020
A Brother's Love: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Retold by Becky Cerling Powers
3/3/2020
My Two Dads, part three: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Janimarie Rowe as told to Becky Cerling Powers
2/27/2020
My Two Dads, part two: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Janimarie Rowe as told to Becky Cerling Powers
2/26/2020
My Two Dads, part one: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Janimarie Rowe as told to Becky Cerling Powers
2/25/2020
Grandma's Apron: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Jennifer Cummings
2/20/2020
Colors of the Beetle: a retold faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
2/13/2020
Cantaloupe Crop Disaster: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Glen Hinshaw
2/5/2020
Afraid to Sleep at Night (Psalm 91): a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
1/22/2020
How the Camel Got His Hump: a retold faith based story
Becky Cerling Powers
1/13/2020
Growing Up With Polio: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Laura Jane Cerling
1/9/2020
All Things Bright and Beautiful: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers, poem by Cecil Frances Alexander
1/7/2020
One Dollar for a Donut: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
1/1/2020
Star of Wonder
Paula Kortkamp Combs
12/26/2019
The Shepherds
Paula Kortkamp Combs
12/24/2019
Mary and the Angel
Paula Kortkamp Combs
12/18/2019
Zechariah
Paula Kortkamp Combs
12/17/2019
Christmas Cookies: a a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Laura Jane Cerling
12/10/2019
First Thanksgiving, Part 3: Gifts & Gratitude (a faith based story from the Story Powerline)
Rami Scully
11/28/2019
First Thanksgiving, Part 2: Beginning in Weakness (a faith based story)
Rami Scully
11/28/2019
First Thanksgiving, Part 1: Enduring the Sea Voyage (a faith based story)
Rami Scully
11/27/2019
Rescuing my Family in Wartime, Part 3: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Néaouguen Nodjimbadem as told to Becky Cerling Powers
11/22/2019
Rescuing my Family in Wartime, Part 2: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Néaouguen Nodjimbadem
11/19/2019
Rescuing my Family in Wartime, Part 1: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Nodji (Néaouguen Nodjimbadem) as told to Becky Cerling Powers
11/12/2019
Grandma Time: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Jennifer Cummings
11/1/2019
The Love & Diaper (Nappy) Connection
Becky Cerling Powers
10/25/2019
Avon Perfume Surprise: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
10/22/2019
Saving Butterscotch: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Karen M. Pickett Ward
10/16/2019
The Patient in Room 116: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
10/8/2019
Belshazzar: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Retold by Paula Kortkamp Combs
10/2/2019
My Mysterious Relative & the Missing Paycheck: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Becky Cerling Powers
9/26/2019
Keeping in Touch with Cousins: a faith based story from the Story Powerline
Paula Kortkamp Combs
9/24/2019
How the Ostrich Got His Long Neck: a faith based retold story from the Story Powerline
Retold by Becky Cerling Powers
9/9/2019